Autumn days when the grass is jewelled...

I can smell it. I can feel it. It's on the way. It's almost here....AUTUMN! It's the slight chill in the air, the way the light looks at 3pm, the way I caved not half an hour ago and stuck the heating on. It's being excited about the leather gloves with a button at the wrist in a lovely, steely grey - much like the Tin Man's hands - and winter coats and hats. It's seeing brilliant sunshine and yet still having a red nose. It's being in House of Fraser and standing 'in Christmas' - the section full of cards and candy and baubles and reds, holly greens, silver, gold. It's buying the early season tangerines in Asda, green on the outside but oh-so Christmassy in the middle. It's socks in bed, leaves on the turn, red starbucks cups, talk of Christmas 'do's'. It's how if I don't dry my hair properly in the morning, by the time I get to work it's frozen at the ends. It's the crisp, cold, snappy, dry, tingly, thrilling, new, red, gold, crunchy, conkery,woolly tights, winter boot vibe of the autumnal season as it draws on apace.

My most favourite time of year.

I can't wait.

September

Here we are. A new month. A new season. And it feels like a new season. I don't mean in weather terms. I feel...stagnated, impatient, eager, keen, searching, hungry, yearning...but for what I don't yet know. Something is just out of my grasp, just about to appear on the horizon, when I see it, I'll know, but until then I'm fumbling in the dark. Things are changing. Suddenly the world seems like a big place again. The world isn't so much focused on Merseyside for me anymore. I ask myself why this is. People are moving, relationships are evolving. Abbi and Chris now live on the South Coast. Emm will shortly be in London. 3 extremely key relationships have shifted, and both Rich and I are having to adjust to that, it creates, or rather precipitates change. Change is necessary. Change is good. But sometimes it sucks. Things that both Rich and I relied on other people for we are now coming to rely on one another for, thus we as a unit are tighter and closer than ever, which is good. Manchester no longer feels so far away when once upon a time it really did. My perspective is shifting. Life seems too short and precious to waste worrying about mortgages and weight watchers and pension plans and job security and housing markets and accruing more annual leave through years of service..and yet the practical aspect of me that refuses to give up the ghost shouts louder...I don't know what it is I'm feeling....not discontent, not unhappiness, but perhaps a sense of there's still more to come. There's a plan, of that I feel certain. But as to what it is, I currently have no clue.